When Men Age Quietly: What Father’s Day Reveals About Midlife, Andropause, and Allyship

A TIME TO CELEBRATE, A MOMENT TO NOTICE

Father’s Day tends to focus on the visible: the guidance, the sacrifice, the role modeling. But for many men, what goes unseen in midlife may matter just as much.

This year, in our work with midlife communities, we have had a powerful realisation: Midlife wellness must include men too.

It is not just the greying hair or slower mornings. It is a deeper shift. It is hormonal, emotional, and often invisible. While menopause has gradually entered mainstream conversation, its male counterpart still lives in the shadows: Andropause.

This silence is not just cultural. It is systemic. And it is time we paid attention.

THE QUIET HORMONAL SHIFT FEW MEN NAME

Unlike menopause, andropause does not arrive with a dramatic physiological milestone. Instead, testosterone levels begin a slow decline — about 1% a year from age 40. By age 70, a man may have lost nearly half of his testosterone baseline.

What follows is not often recognized as hormonal: fatigue, mood swings, lower libido, memory fog, and disrupted sleep.

According to a clinic-based health screening conducted on 1,000 men in Singapore between 2007 and 2009, it was found that 26.4% suffered from low testosterone levels. Recognising the symptoms and going for testing promptly is important, as early intervention and treatment can significantly improve quality of life and overall health

Still, symptoms don’t always prompt action. Because they don’t feel like symptoms. They feel like failing.

WHEN FATHERS BECOME THEIR OWN ALLIES

Through our work at Surety, we have seen men stand up as powerful allies to the women in their lives navigating menopause. They ask questions, learn new terminology, and offer support at home and at work.

When we help men understand andropause, we destigmatise help-seeking behaviour, create more emotionally intelligent homes and workplaces, and build a culture where women and men can navigate midlife changes together, not in isolation.

But few expect or prepare for their own version of midlife change.

Male allyship often starts with understanding others. But the next step is often neglected: allying with oneself. Recognising that men, too, undergo complex biological and emotional transitions. That vulnerability is not weakness. And that asking for help isn’t just valid—it’s necessary.

WHY THIS ISN’T JUST A “MEN’S ISSUE”

The implications of ignoring andropause extend far beyond the individual. Untreated hormonal imbalances can affect not just health, but relationships, work performance, and emotional presence at home.

And yet, how often do families, partners, employers or even doctors ask a midlife man if his exhaustion might be hormonal?

Stigma around male ageing remains potent. We interpret midlife shifts as burnout, irritability, or “just part of aging.” But what if we began to ask different questions? What if support systems evolved with awareness, not assumption?

REIMAGINING MIDLIFE: A FESTIVAL AS A MIRROR

Following the success of the inaugural Menopause Festival in 2024, we’re expanding the scope. In October 2025, Surety will launch Singapore’s first-ever Midlife Festival, a space for dialogue that includes not just women, but men, their spouses, and families.

Event Details

Date: 24–25 October 2025

Time: 9:30 AM – 5:30 PM (SGT)

Location: Central Singapore (venue to be confirmed)

Target Audience: Day 1 - Corporate, HR Professionals, DEI Leads, Advocates & Champions, Day 2 - General Public

Last year’s media features included:

• CNA: “This 27-year-old woman started menopause platform, Surety”

• The Straits Times: “Gen Z start-up launches Singapore’s first menopause festival”

• The Straits Times: “A to Z of 2024: More hope, less shame around menopause”

  
  

This year, the festival moves forward and toward inclusive midlife care for all genders.

Click HERE to waitlist now for first drips & pre-sales discount

Whether you're a man exploring your own transition, a loved one learning how to support, or simply curious about this next chapter of life, this festival is for you!

A FATHER’S DAY WORTH REDEFINING

This Father’s Day, let’s celebrate the strength of fathers and also their humanity.

Because real strength lies in being seen, supported, and understood.

This Father’s Day, what if we paused, not only to thank the fathers in our lives, but to see them clearly?

To ask how they’re sleeping. How they’re feeling. If they’ve been to the doctor. If they feel seen.

Midlife is not a crisis to be managed alone. It is a collective turning point. And every man navigating it deserves to know: he is not the only one.

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References

1. Travison, T. G., et al. (2007). The Relationship Between Testosterone and Health in Aging Men. The Journal of Clinical Endocrinology & Metabolism.

2. Khoo, J., et al. (2011). Prevalence of andropause symptoms in Singaporean men. Annals of the Academy of Medicine Singapore.

3. Mayo Clinic. (2024). Male menopause: Myth or reality?

4. Global Action on Men’s Health (2022). Testosterone Deficiency in Midlife Men.

5. Healthline. (2022). What Is Andropause and How Is It Treated?